It's been a while since my last blog and I while I was thinking of something to blog before I blog my thingies for a course, I thought of this. Just when I thought I'm okay being better, I realized I want to be the best.. My hated things poisons my mind whenever I can't say everything out loud. This may not be a good idea but I guess as a blogger I am free to express myself to whatever reason, right? So, here we go.
Everyone of us have certain hated things in their mind and body. Some may be a little out of place but some are considerable. I can say that being me, a girl with an average height and a little over in weight that may be artistic but a little dramatic that may be a leader but not always a winner, you cannot help but to feel a little hateful about things that annoys you. The first thing that I, not actually hate but I never wanted to talk about it, is my weight. I know it must be my fault that's why I'm in this position but the worst thing that is always happening because of this ballast is that mean and feeling perfect people always tries to compare me with some ugly, even larger and inconsiderable lady who's not too distant to me. I hate being compared with other person. I know I am a mean person and being in the position where you hate being compare but because the person you're being compared to was your friend you cannot help but to just keep your mouth shut just to be civilized and to be not to discriminating. I've always been in that same spot where people can't help but to compare me with a girl that I cannot hate for being compared with. I am the kind of girl who doesn't want to be in the same level with others. It's always either you're one step lower than me or one step higher. Another thing that I surely hate is when I cannot express myself. When I know I have a point and I don't want to lose in an argument. But the worse scenario that you'll ever be caught on with this problem is when you have a friend that doesn't want to lose too in your argument and because you know you can be the evilest person just to win the argument, you just choose to keep your mouth shut again (I know I've always kept my mouth shut, now a days) just to nice to your friend. I'm not usually the compensating one but because you still can spell their mood swings, you just keep on being the nicer one. Another thing that I really hate and probably one of my worst insecurities is when there is someone you just know by name that has always think that they have the spot light directed on them. It's just freaking irritating when someone just thought that they are the most beautiful, most popular **** s****** girl in the campus. When they thought that they own the world and their smile can captivate every man's heart but in reality their ability to flirt around with people are the only reason men loves to hang out with them. Yes, I know everyone could hate it, but you know what I love about it? It is the thought that I can actually say dirty things about her that people around that person also sees. That was the only payback that I can get from an attention whore. lol. Another thing that I hate is there is a certain someone who's having almost everything that you have but you're not the one that people notice but that copy cat. Don't you think it stinks? Being the person who originally have everything but when another person tries to copy you, she was the complemented for it. Well, you know what's the only good thing that can happen to it? It is that even she tried to have everything that you have, she'll always be someone irrelevant. haha! And yes, I'm down to my last hated thing. That one thing that I either hate or love. The moment when the princess in the fairy tale was not you but someone really unexpected and the ugly duckling of the story wasn't the ugly duckling after all but it's you. I know, it sucks to feel that you own everything. That you are satisfied with everything that you have even if you don't have everything. But when little princess came, everything just swept away. Just when you thought she was just the supporting actress in your movie, it turned out that she will have everything you've always worked hard for and what she just did is just stand in front of everything and it became hers. She became the center of the story while you, the expected lead actress, became just an extra walking as a silhouette at the back of her.
Well, anyways, enough of bitching around. lol. I know this was a very irrelevant post but spare my dramas, I just wanted to make an artwork out of the things that pollute my mind nowadays. Yes, this is an artwork. So thank you for everyone who read my story. It has been a pleasure to write something for you. Oh, BTW, the lesson of this blog: Control everything in your story. From the title page 1 up to the last or else you'll turn out like Rubi, damaged princess that lost everything because of wrong decisions.
PS: If you don't know Rubi, practically the lead role of her self-entitled Filipino TV series but the ending turned out to not for her. If you still can't understand, google it. It's worth it. TPH
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